Why can't a bicycle stand on its own? Because it's too tired.

What's going down? Junkies? What did the big flower say to the Little Flower? Hey, there, bud.

Knock knock. Dishes. Dishes, Sean Conway.

Hey gentlemen. Did you hear? They're not going to make 12-inch rulers any longer.

Hey guys. I hope you guys are doing well so I figured I'd try this Dad joke thing out um and see how I do. Um, but I heard Sean started working out. Do you know, what is best? Um what is his favorite exercises is jumping to commercial, bye.

Hey, junkies price here. First dispatch. so, my wife asked me the other day, why I carry a gun around in the house And I told her. Because I'm afraid of Decepticons. She laughed. And then I laughed. Then the toaster laugh. So, I shot the toaster. Niggas and Pops.

All right, here you go. Here's another 1. Uh, what did the elephant? Say to the naked, man. How do you breathe out of that thing?

Chunky, dog. What's going on News? Junkie crew. All right, Dad joke of the day. Woman walks in from grocery shopping into the kitchen, sees the husband, stalking around the house with a flash water. She questions, what are you doing? He said I'm hunting flies she laughs as if you got any. He said yeah, 5 of them 3. Males 2 females The wife, laughs. So, how do you know, there was 3, males in 2 feet now? He said back to her 3 of them were on a beer, can 2 were on the phone.

Hey, there junkies long time. Listener. Seldom dispatcher. So back in the 90s and early thousands, when scientists were messing with genetics and trying to clone Dolly and all that crap, my dad told me about an experiment where they tried to splice a crabs, DNA with a cheetah's DNA. Oh boy. It went sideways real fast. For drizzle.

I don't know anything about the Orlando library system, but where I live here in Nashville, Tennessee? The libraries are a major place for homeless people to spend a majority of their day. In fact, the downtown library had a fire explosion in the parking garage last year in the downtown library, which is the big major major 1. It was closed for months and months. And when we had the big ice storm this year, it was a major problem that it was below freezing for so many days. And the city had to set up like all these different like shelters and stuff for people during the day that they normally only set up at night because they were relying on the libraries and the library downtown specifically. So whether they say it's a part of their plan or not, the city actually uses the libraries as like day camps, for homeless people around here so I'm sure it's the same all over the place.