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Dad joke!
What is the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? A hippo is really heavy, and a Zippo is a little lighter.

You can change prices.
What up News, Junkie dingo here, I just want to chime in real quick. You can change the prices. I've seen it done. 1 time, I took my cousin into a Guitar Center and he was like, 14 years old, he had a little bit of cash in his pocket and he was like, I need some bass strings. And the bass strings that they had were, um, they're like 18 bucks. He's like I got 12 dollars, straight up. Can we make a deal? The dude, sold them to him. Anything.

Joke
It's lady went to her Proctologist. He said, what's the issue? She said my butt hurts around the entrance. He said, well it's called an exit and he's going to continue to hurt if you use it as an entrance.

Dad joke
Hey junkies, what do you call a psychic? Midget that's escaped from jail. A small medium at Large.

Rate my dad joke
What do you call a dog with no legs? No matter, he ain't coming to you.

Dad Joke
Why are baby? Strawberries always crying. Because their parents are always in a jam.

Dad joke
What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dre.

Dad Joke
Hey, Junkies. Did you hear about the guy who got severely injured playing peekaboo? He's still stuck in the ICU. That all gets me.

Dad joke you up
Hey there. Junkies, what's going on? I was told by a little birdie that today. This week is show us your blank dad jokes, right? So I don't have too many and they're not that great, but here we go. Okay, so what is Peter? Pan's favorite place to eat out. You guess it. It's Wendy's. Bye.

Dad joke
Hey, this is Brother Dev here. What's a kidnapper's? Favorite type of shoe. White vans.