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Kids on a plane
What's up, junkies happy? Today, it's Monday. It sucks. Uh, Sean. So my daughter's are 3 and a half 4 in November and they have traveled at minimum at minimum 12 times in their life already on a plane, we have never had a single issue with them. Because before we get them on the plane, we explain to them. What's going on. We talked to them even at 2 and 3 years old they understand hey you have to act a little bit appropriate. You have to do you have to listen? It's not that hard as a parent to do, if you can't do this as a parent. You shouldn't be a parent, and there's a lot of people out there that shouldn't be parents. All right. You should have been clipped from the very beginning of Life. We going to pop up.

TTS Dispatch 🤖
I was flying to Dubai from Atlanta which is a 14 hour flight for work. I had a first class ticket and in first class lounge I saw Orlando Jones walk in. On the flight he ended up sitting next to me and we were the middle seats in first class. I was too nervous to bother him so I just ended up sleeping next to him on the flight. Very nice guy and very funny. [Crowd Cheering] [Rimshot]

I was a Dad Joke Finalist. This is my concession speech.
Hey News Junkie uh this is meowing later. I was a finalist for the rate, my dad joke and while I didn't win at least, I lost to an actual father and son and that seems appropriate. So congratulations to them. um, and as my father always said, if life hands you melons You might have dyslexia.

Stacy’s Mom retired teacher. So happy
Good Morning, News junkies, it's Stacy small after 35 years of teaching, I am not going to school today. On the first day of school it's such a great feeling. I'm headed to the bar to have a drink to celebrate. Happy Monday.

TTS Dispatch 🤖
I need you to prepare yourself. The next Rate My Blank is going to be a wild one [Wilhelm Scream] will you be ready with some good content for once? [Crowd Cheering]

Bad dad joke!
What do you call? Someone who clears bushes for a living? A politician.


Dad joke of the day!
Scotty Long duk Dong here? How does a cat like its stake? Well.

TTS Dispatch 🤖
what do you do if your wife starts smoking? slow down and use some lubricant.

dad joke alert. listen before
What do you call 5? Spanish people that cannot swim. Cinco.