A user with the screen name ‘That Ain’t My Kid’ posted this shocking photo on Twitter yesterday. He claimed the young girl in the photo was his sister and told R&B star J Cole that if he didn’t retweet him, he would shoot his sister. J Cole obliged out of an abundance of caution.

Later that day, ‘That Ain’t My Kid’ said police officers visited his house to question him about the incident (I can see this being used, despite Twitter’s non-cooperation, as a defense for programs like PRISM) and verify that the weapon was indeed a BB gun. He later offered a semi-apology for the incident.

Follow-up Tweets:

@Is_That_Corey it was a BB gun. Cops came to my house and everything. If it was real I'd be in jail. Use your head

— That Aint My Kid (@_TzC_) June 19, 2013

I'm a man of my word @JColeNC pic.twitter.com/zthww3JmzW

— That Aint My Kid (@_TzC_) June 18, 2013

Being an Internet Thug backfired on me. I learned my damn lesson… I hope White Twitter still accepts me after all this

— That Aint My Kid (@_TzC_) June 18, 2013

What a jackass.

One of the most popular posts currently on China’s microblogging service Sina Weibo (at time of translation)…

I don’t know if this is real, if it’s a Photoshop or if it is just an idea but it’s a good one. This would probably scare at least a few creeps off. Then again, is there really anything more effective at preventing the rape of women than this shocking gadget?

There’s more, obviously NSFW, at this link.

This truly takes Reality Whore to the next level.

They’re the pictures parents treasure forever: a class photo that captures an entire school year in an instant.

So imagine the confusion and upset mom Anna Belanger felt when she discovered her son had been placed off to the side in his Grade 2 class photo, simply because he was in a wheelchair.

‘I couldn’t comprehend how the photographer could look through the lens and think that this was good composition… this just boggled the mind,’ she said.

I don’t have a big problem with the placement of her disabled son in this photo.

Look, unfortunately the kid is in a wheelchair so things like this are going to happen. Was the teacher supposed to pop him out of the chair and let him flop on the bench the other kids were sitting on? He looks proud and happy in the photo and I’m not sure there was a better way to take the shot. In cases like this, a parent pointing out how different her child is will do more harm than good. What do you think?

Some of these kids will play colllege baseball next year.

Miss Utah (Marissa Powell) didn’t win the Miss USA pageant last night, she was trounced by Miss Connecticut. However, she did manage to grab the attention of viewers with a nearly unintelligible answer to a question posed by judge Nene Leaks.

QUESTION: “A recent report shows that in 40% of American families with children, women are the primary earners yet they continue to earn less than men. What does this say about society?”

ANSWER: “I think we can relate this back to education and how, we are…continuing to try to strive to.. [AWKWARD PAUSE] figure out how to create jobs…right now. That is the biggest problem. And I think, especially the men, are…seen as the…leaders of this. And so we need to try to figure out how to…create education better…so that we can solve this problem. Thank you.”

No, Miss Utah, THANK YOU.

The public implosion of potential Zimmerman case juror Jerry Counelis continues. The once potential juror first outed by THE NEWS JUNKIE this week (a call the following day ratcheted up the crazy) showed up at the Seminole County courthouse on Friday and proceeded to lose his mind.

Counelis was at the courthouse on Friday during the lunch hour complaining about his anonymity and saying he is hiring an attorney. According to the trespassing report, Counelis walked into the foyer of the jury assembly and expressed his privacy concerns and animosity toward the jury process to the clerk.

Authorities approached him and said that as a dismissed juror he could not be in the jury assembly area or have any contact with potential jurors until after the trial.

Counelis then said, “do they know what they are in for!” pointing to the jury assembly room.

Were the potential jurors to have heard Counelis, this whole process would face a reboot, costing a week of time and as much as $100,000 tax dollars. He was escorted from the scene by police and told to stay away from the courthouse with the threat of arrest. Judging by this nutjobs actions in the last few days, I’m guessing he shows up again on Monday. If he was arrested for perjury now it would save us all time, money and drama. Someone grab the cuffs.

On Thursday he sent me this message just before deleting his Facebook account:

I think I’m starting to like this guy.

Mike Falconer, 45, pulled his truck over in March when he saw something roaming around in a field at Myakka River State Park in Sarasota County, the Sun Sentinel reported this week. He and his son can be seen in the short video chasing down what they think is a Skunk Ape — a large, stinky beast and reputed cousin of Bigfoot etched in Florida lore.

To be clear, there’s no such thing as Bigfoot or the Skunk Ape. But what is this?

A Brooklyn high school teacher escaped jail yesterday after she pleaded guilty to having sex with a 16-year-old student.

Erin Sayar, 37, lost her teaching license over the scandal as well as her marriage after her husband filed divorce papers in January and moved out of their Park Slope apartment.

Heavily-tattooed Sayar was an English teacher at James Madison High School.

When the judge asked her yesterday if she had sex with teenager Kevin Eng she said yes.

Sayar had both oral and intercourse with the 16 year-old at least 8 times. She was charged with 60 counts of statuary rape and sexual abuse. She also gave the kid weed, which she hid in her filing cabinet. Not only did she do all of this when she was supposed to be tutoring the teen, she also sent him more than 3,800 text messages, more than 227 per day. Apparently the boy, who went to James Madison High School (now known locally as Horndog High), was able to describe tattoos on ‘intimate’ parts of her body.

For all of this she will serve exactly zero days in jail. Because she’s a woman.

Some guy named Dennis, who may or may not be a real person, allegedly proposed to his girlfriend Ann. When proposing, there is much pressure to be as creative as possible. I’ve heard of guys putting the ring in a martini, a cake and even on the family pet. I’ve never heard of someone putting the engagement ring in what appears to be a Wendy’s chicken sandwich. Maybe Dennis really, really likes fast food? Believe it or not, she said yes.

Would you call out a Facebook friend for a lame proposal like this?

XX – EXCLUSIVE TO THE NEWS JUNKIE – XX

You probably remember Jerry Counelis, right? Hell, it was only yesterday I outed him as the lying Juror E7 in the pool of potential Zimmerman trial jurors. Well today, after hearing from a few of his friends, Counelis decided he was willing to talk. It was less of a conversation, more the implosion of a crazed man. I have audio of the heated chat but I’m not going to release it just yet. To be honest, I’m not sure he’s done yelling and tossing the phone around.

First, let’s revisit what this potential juror wrote on Facebook:

“…..In Sanford…& I CAN tell you THIS. “Justice”…IS Coming!…& I’ll tell you why. The ONLY reason this corrupt City Police dept. was stonewalling was because since they KNOWINGLY worked with this Self-appointed “Neighborhood Watch” Security…& KNEW he carried a weapon…They knew they AND the Homeowners Association were Liable for HUGE $$$ damages in court…MINUTES after the shooting occurred. But with the noise WE made…it couldn’t be covered up. I only hope the Feds go farther than just THIS case in investigating This “Police Force”. The Seminole County “Justice’ System needs an ENEMA…& they just MIGHT GET one!”

Counelis had clearly made up his mind, despite several statements to the contrary in court. He was SURE Zimmerman was GUILTY and he wouldn’t stop until JUSTICE was served, even if he had to commit perjury along the way. Jerry Counelis was clearly trying to tell the prosecution and defense exactly what they wanted to hear. He thought that everyone else was so stupid that his past statements would never come up. He was wrong.

There’s been much discussion of whether or not he will be charged with perjury. I think to not charge him with the crime would send a disturbing message to other potential jurors in cases as serious as this. Here are just a few of the many times Counelis fell short of telling the truth in court yesterday. (See Exchanges 1, 2 and 3 below)

EXCHANGE 1

DEFENSE ATTORNEY: “Did you ever do anything to support that cause, if you will? I don’t mean to describe it in a way that you don’t understand but if I say ‘the cause,’ the idea that George Zimmerman wasn’t arrested…”

COUNELIS: “Oh no. No. No.”

DEFENSE ATTORNEY: “You didn’t actively support that cause in any way?”

COUNELIS: “His arrest?”

DEFENSE ATTORNEY: “Correct.”

COUNELIS: “No. Because I wouldn’t have known. I mean, why would I if I didn’t understand the facts?”

The statements above are clearly at odds with his Facebook post on March 21, 2012.

EXCHANGE 2

DEFENSE ATTORNEY: “Do you have an opinion about the guilt or innocence of George Zimmerman?”

COUNELIS: “It has caused me to give weight to that potential until I have to look back and realize that I don’t have any of the facts necessary to make such a judgement, to form such an opinion. I need more facts, that’s what I would always come to the conclusion.”

EXCHANGE 3

DEFENSE ATTORNEY: “So, if I understand, sort of, in sum. You have a lot of information about the case but you haven’t formed any opinions one way or the other on Mr Zimmerman’s guilt or innocence?”

COUNELIS: “If you can call the speculation from both sides information.”

DEFENSE ATTORNEY: “Here’s what I’m talking about. I’m talking about what’s out there. Whatever it is that’s out there?”

COUNELIS: “Yes, I’ve observed a lot, especially back then, there was a lot to absorb.”

DEFENSE ATTORNEY: “And after absorbing all that, you haven’t formed any opinions yourself?”

COUNELIS: “No.”

DEFENSE ATTORNEY: “About George Zimmerman’s guilt or innocence?”

COUNELIS: “No. Because I don’t have the information to qualify that any opinion.”

To answer “no” to a question about having an opinion on the guilt or innocence of George Zimmerman is to lie. What the judge decides to do about that is anyone’s guess at this point.

As for the call, here’s a short transcript of the last 10 seconds:

THE NEWS JUNKIE: “This Facebook post is from a man who has clearly made up his mind as to who is guilty and who is not guilty.”

COUNELIS: “No it is not. And you know what, you’re fucking twisting everything right out of shape. You’re full of shit… You’re full of shit buddy and I’m about done with this fucking conversation because your just as fucking honest as I thought you were. You lying fucking piece of shit. Fuck you, buddy, you’re done.

THE NEWS JUNKIE: “You’re a lunatic.”

COUNELIS: “Fuck you. Fuck you. Hang this phone up. How do I hang this thing up?”

Not only is this man a perjurer, he’s a fucking lunatic.

Here’s the ridiculous exclusive the Sun ran on June 8:

THREE passenger jets had a close encounter with UFOs above Britain’s Scientology HQ, a report has revealed.

Their pilots each saw “two flat, silver discs” as they lined up to land at Gatwick Airport — and some flew within 100ft.

Air traffic control staff then spotted a total of SIX UFOs on their radar before they suddenly vanished.

Apparently, the Church of Scientology wasn’t too happy about the article and sent a pack of lawyers after the Sun, as they do whenever they’re mentioned in a negative light. The Sun responded with what may well be my favorite printed apology of the last few years.

Love it.

Remember those hot IDF soldiers under fire for posing in these ‘raunchy’ photos. Well, they’re back! Or perhaps these are just some of their fellow troops. Either way, this time they’re pole dancing with a rifle of some sort. These Israeli chicks just keep on giving up the good stuff.

The Jerusalem Post says the footage, released by Channel 2, is ‘another blow to the IDF.’ I would suggest that this particular type of blow is a good one.

The farmer, named in the Chinese media only as Mr Li, perhaps underestimated the nannying tendencies of the Chinese state.

Shortly after he proudly posted photographs of his alien on the internet, he was arrested by the police for five days for “fabrications” that “disturbed the public order”.

Mr Li was forced to admit that he had indeed sought to use his model, held together with chicken wire and glue, to mislead his fellow Chinese about the existence of celestial creatures.

You create a hoax like this in America, you get your own reality show or – at the very least – an appearance on someone else’s. In China, they find you, round you up and arrest you for causing panic among the masses. I’m guessing Coast To Coast will never make it to Shanghai.

Not to be outdone by a Taco Bell employee licking a stack of hard shell tacos, a Wendy’s worker emerges with a hunger for ice cream – directly from the tap. Reports suggest Wendy’s is ‘investigating‘ the photo leading many to believe the worker will be fired. However, the original photo was posted on Reddit.com with a very misleading title. The title read ‘I was going to buy a frosty from Wendy’s until I saw an employee do this.’ A similar images search on Google shows no matches previous to the post but why is the person taking the photo behind the counter? It seems, at the very least, that the Reddit OP was a liar.

And, really, isn’t liking a stack of tacos worse than this?

Just everyone, relax: This sinkhole, which has reportedly now been boarded over, is filled with water tinged with some florescent dye that official-agency types apparently use to trace water flow. That kind of thing is useful in studying sinkholes, since they can be much larger than they initially seem.

A post on Reddit with this photo had a few people freaking out, wondering if that whole Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle thing was a bit more fact than fiction. This florescent dye is a lot more common than you would think as it’s a very useful took for tracing water flow.

As bizarre as this looks, it’s actually quite normal.

Always beware of the trend story. Just because Oprah tells you teens are giving out oral favors for bracelets or some news outlet tells you kids are drinking vodka through their eyeballs doesn’t mean it’s a widespread phenomenon. So maybe we should all take the latest ‘trend’ of oculolinctus with a grain of salt. Or maybe not?

The teacher goes on to say that a survey conducted among the school’s “year 6″ students (mostly 12-year-old) found that “a surprising one third of the kids had done ‘eyeball licking,’ or had had their eyeballs licked.”

Apparently the act of licking someone’s eyeball is considered the next “base” after French kissing.

The practice — also known as “worming” or “oculolinctus” — has apparently led to rash of pink eye (conjunctivitis) cases in Japanese elementary and middle schools.

So why would anyone be into this?

“My boyfriend started licking my eyeballs years ago and I just loved it,” a a 29-year-old environmental science student from the U.S. Virgin Islands told The Huffington Post. “I’m not with him anymore, but I still like to ask guys to lick my eyeballs. I just love it because it turns me on, like sucking on my toes. It makes me feel all tingly.”

It makes her feel “all tingly” when someone does this:

I don’t get it. Are all the kids really into this crap?

The odd thing is, despite the risk of pink eye, this is about the safest sex one could engage in. I’d much rather have my child ‘eyeballing’ than taking it a step further. I just can’t wrap my head around why they would want to do this or have this done to them.

Maybe I’ll try it out on one of you folks. Any takers?

Let’s start with the original ads, created by Kmart’s marketing team:

[Ad Titled 'Big Gas Savings']

[Ad Titled 'Ship My Pants']

The official ads, though racy by Kmart standards, were actually pretty creative. But as they spun out into the viral world, there were bound to be imitators. The new video, released by YouTube channel TheGunfordmay, is definitely not Kmart-approved. Where as ‘ship my pants’ and ‘big gas savings’ are playful jokes, this is a riff on how knickers sounds like the n-word.

The ‘TheGunfordmay’ channel was created on June 8th of this year and the video was released 2 days ago. As far as I can tell, The Gunford May is an improv group out of California. Below is a snapshot of the group from Facebook.

Noticeably absent from this photo is the black guy who makes the video a little more comfortable.

The Gunford May has a relatively small online footprint, aside from a now-deleted Facebook page and the community page linked above. There’s also a mention on Twitter of them performing at Second City LA.

2morrow night @ SaturdayNightsMainEvent we have special guest groups Ficus & TheGunfordmay! @SecondCityLA 9:30pm. Comps available #improv

— Bro Squad 5 (@BroSquad5) March 30, 2013

With the video making rounds today and destined for a post on BuzzFeed, Huffington Post, etc, you have to wonder if this took the joke a bit too far. I’m not a fan of drawing lines in the sand when it comes to jokes and I won’t do that here but, if I worked for Kmart’s PR department, I wouldn’t be too happy with this parody. A portion of the audience will undoubtedly think it’s a genuine Kmart ad and a portion of that portion will obviously be offended.

What do you think about the spoof?

NASCAR driver Jason Leffler died after an accident Wednesday night in a dirt car event at Bridgeport Speedway in Sweedsboro, New Jersey.

Here’s what his car looked like after the crash:

Leffler was ejected from the vehicle during the crash.

XX – EXCLUSIVE TO THE NEWS JUNKIE – XX

Did Jerry Counelis attempt to sabotage the Zimmerman trial?

Today, a potential juror in the Zimmerman trial was caught in a web of lies. He was known in court as Juror E7 and he claimed to have watched Fox News on the regular. He also said he wasn’t into politics and claimed ignorance on most issues related to the case.

Then, this happened.

The juror talked about his love of guitars, among other topics.

After some searching, I think this is possibly the offending post:

“…..In Sanford…& I CAN tell you THIS. “Justice”…IS Coming!…& I’ll tell you why. The ONLY reason this corrupt City Police dept. was stonewalling was because since they KNOWINGLY worked with this Self-appointed “Neighborhood Watch” Security…& KNEW he carried a weapon…They knew they AND the Homeowners Association were Liable for HUGE $$$ damages in court…MINUTES after the shooting occurred. But with the noise WE made…it couldn’t be covered up. I only hope the Feds go farther than just THIS case in investigating This “Police Force”. The Seminole County “Justice’ System needs an ENEMA…& they just MIGHT GET one!”

Boy, if this is our guy, seems like he was into politics more than just a little bit (here’s his Change.org profile). In fact, it seems that he was not only interested in this case but also interested in pretending to be the ‘average joe’ he thought the defense and prosecution would choose to sit on the jury – a juror who would ultimately determine the fate of George Zimmerman. Thankfully, this was caught early and he was likely bounced. If he wasn’t, you would have had clear grounds for an appeal, no matter the sentence.

I believe it was Jerry Counelis because this was the only Zimmerman-related post on the date given by the judge. There are just over 20 comments on that particular post and few are from people living in Central Florida. Not only does Jerry Counelis live in Lake Mary, he also has dozens of photos of guitar and instruments, just as juror E7 did.

Counelis or not, shouldn’t a juror be punished for outright lying in an attempt to get seated on a jury? It’s my opinion that many of these jurors are trying to give the ‘right’ answer in hopes of landing an ‘exciting’ juror gig. But there is a man’s life a stake here. What should happen to Juror E7?

I tried to contact Jerry Counelis via a publicly listed number for comment. No one answered the listed number. I’m going to reach out via Facebook to confirm.

Update: WESH says Juror E7 called the Sanford police department ‘corrupt.’ This matches the post in the screenshot above from Counelis. Legal experts say he could be arrested and sentenced for perjury among other charges.

Update: E7 has been officially dismissed.

George Zimmerman's attorneys have confirmed that a potential juror has been eliminated in Zimmerman's second… http://t.co/1Avy6UN4zJ

— WKMG Local 6 News (@clickorlando) June 12, 2013

Update: Local 6 confirms dismissed juror is Jerry Counelis.